Eating Late

Both yesterday and today, I failed to get my lunch until well after one o'clock. Both times the aide who gave me lunch apologized to me, and neither time tried to rush me through eating, so I haven't made this an issue. My supper has also arrived well after six a couple times recently; that aide told me she had to feed somebody else first. I seem to have the reputation here of being a patient man.

Something seems to be going on here. Some aides have quit, and others have been fired, or so I hear. The administrator seems to have recently resigned. That would put the staff still here under more pressure, and indeed about every aide or nurse who came into my rooms yesterday told me what a wild day it was.

Since I don't eat breakfast, and since I do my work on the computer during the afternoon, eating lunch so late is a problem. I've had time to do my email and keep up both blogs, but that's about it. In my own home, with aides who could be more focused, I could establish and maintain a schedule that would give me more time to pursue my goals and interests.

Bright, Noisy Nights

You'd think they'd try to keep things calm and quiet at night in places like nursing homes so people can sleep, wouldn't you? Well, in my experience here, that's not particularly what happens.

Most nights here, well into the morning hours, I hear television shows, movies, or music. It might come from residents' rooms, I don't know, but it's clear. I also hear talking and laughter from aides. I hear that because the door to my room is open. They even block my door open, presumably so they can get in here quickly if they need to-- but that also lets the light from the hallway in. I block it with my pillow.

I can't say all that keeps me awake, but I do look forward to my own home and quiet. dark nights.

Consistency

For the past couple of weeks, I've largely had aides I've been comfortable with, and the more I've worked with these same few aides, the easier things have become. By getting to know these few and how they approach the work, I can anticipate how things are going to go, and it allows me to plan ahead. I'm a planner. The aides also get more relaxed with me the more they work with me.

This period won't last, of course. Staff comes and goes in big places like this. In my own home, working with a home healthcare agency that has a low turnover rate among its aides, hopefully such calm, stable times would be the rule.

Budget Concerns

Though the State of Indiana seems to be in reasonably good financial shape, the U. S. Government is deep in debt. Getting out of that hole will require reform of Medicare and Medicaid, among other things, and in this case, reform will mean substantially reducing the money spent on those programs. There is no option. So, if I can get into my own home with the help of government, will I be able to count on having it for as long as I need it?

Well, probably. There seems to be consensus among politicians that nothing should change in this area for anyone 55 and over, and I'm 57, so if this works out, I should be okay. Also, part of the reform may involve turning a lot of programs back to the states. So, if Indiana is convinced helping people stay out of traditional nursing homes is good public policy, I should be okay again.

Still, there are no guarantees in politically uncertain times. If the economy collapses again, thus both robbing government of tax revenue and increasing government spending, many bets might be off. I'm going to continue trying to sell my writing, and continue trying to find work. Just in case.

Broadening My Options

Mom and I used to take a day every so often and come over here to Indianapolis from Muncie and go to the mall-- not to buy anything, especially, but just to look around and be together. I also went to the occasional movie. Mom would take me to the theater and come back to get me when the movie was due to be over. I'd wander around Ball State's library on my own sometimes, too, just poking around for interesting stuff.

I'd enjoy having the option to do things like that again-- just get up in the morning and decide to do something that day. Now that I live near Indy, there are lots of possibilties, from my old friends the malls to movies to museums. Or maybe go to the occasional game. I've watched basketball games from Hinkle Fieldhouse for as long as I can remember; it'd be fun to see one there in person sometime. Similarly, I'd like to go back to Muncie and watch those mighty Ball State Cardinals a game or so a season.

There's a social director here, and I know they do things and go places. He has asked me if I wanted to join the activities, but I don't. I'm not really a social sort, and I'm not interested in doing activities just to be doing activities. If I had my own home with my own aides, maybe I could do some things that I want to do just because I want to do them. For most people, that's a big part of personal independence.

A Step Forward

I got word yesterday that the process aimed at getting me out of the nursing home and into my own place is moving forward. I have a place on the waiver list required for the process to continue, so that's one more hurdle behind me.

The next step is for the state to hire an independent person to determine exactly what kind of needs I have and how much help from aides I would require. To put that together, the person will interview me and the aides here who work with me the most. That might turn out well in my favor. Fairly often, a new aide will come with a regular aide of mine to watch and see what needs doing and how to do it. They also talk between themselves, as if I wasn't there, or couldn't hear, or couldn't understand them, which is odd. Anyway, my regular aides often tell the new ones how self-sufficient I am. I assume that will be a positive for me.

So far, this process has moved along at a good pace. I have a feeling this might be a point at which the momentum might slow, but I hope not.

Starting And Stopping

This has been a fractured afternoon.

First, lunch was a bit late-- nearly one. After that, I got on my computer, as always, but my aide for the morning was soon back to take my blood pressure. That was 99/65, by the by. Then, my aide for this evening came along to give me a shower. While I was writing this post, yet another aide came in to give me a fiber tablet.

I couldn't do a major writing project here. For those, I need uninterrupted hours to concentrate. True, they take my blood pressure maybe once a month and not always when I'm at the computer, but I never know when somebody might come in here for some reason. I try to accomodate their schedule, knowing they have other people to care for, so I go along. I also understand that most residents here probably aren't trying to work, so the staff is used to having essentially free rein.

In my own place, with aides who work for me, I could set my own daily schedule. I could eat my meals largely when I want, schedule showers for morning or evening, and give myself more time to work. Taking my blood pressure, if needed at all, could be done when I wasn't trying to do something else.